Unlimited wants, limited resources

I WANT THIS! I WANT THIS!!! I saw the better version on “House Bunny” but I really don’t mind this one, from eBay, just that I don’t have any credit card to buy it T_T

Another thing I want is Chuck Bass’ trademark scarf from Gossip Girl, which is not sold anywhere I suppose? But I guess it will be really expensive, sobs.

I hope you hang yourself with your H&M scarf…

I have so many other things I want, which is not easily obtainable T_T

Caroling X’mas Carols

Something on my to-do-list for Christmas this year (too early? No way) is to compile a CD of rare Christmas songs for my mom (well, actually they are not rare, just not the boring ones we keep hearing every year).  Here’s a list of the songs:

1. A Marshmallow World by Brenda Lee

I listened to the version by The Rat Packs and I loved it. But this version is even more wow. I can imagine the postcard scenery of white rooftops and all

2.  Mistletoe and Holly by Frank Sinatra

Hmm. Mistletoe. How romantic.

3. It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas by Bing Crosby

What’s Christmas without Bing Crosby? I love all his Christmas carols

4. Santa Baby by Marilyn Monroe

I bet my sisters will love this one.

5. The Christmas Song by Jackson Five

Ok, so the song itself is not as rare. But Jackson Five? That’s something that my mom will love a lot.

6. Warm and Fuzzy by Billy Gilman

Just a variation to the oldies carols. I love his angelic voice.

7. Here Comes Santa by Linda Eder

Believe me, I’ve never heard the sung version of this song. Most of the time I only listen to the instrumental version, the monotone version from the lights on the christmas tree at home. By the way, this song comes with Santa Claus Is Coming At The Town medley.

8. A Holly Jolly Christmas by Dean Martin

Again, what’s christmas without Dean Martin? My mom has this CD of christmas songs by Nat King Cole and Dean Martin, and it’s our bestest christmas carols collection. Let me add one more by Dean Martin into that collection

9. Christmas in The Trenches by John McDermott

A variation to the joyful songs. This one is more mellow, ballad-ish and I love it because it’s sooo meaningful. It’s about christmas in wartime.

10. Christmas Alphabets by The McGuire Sisters

Took me forever to find this song. Fell in love with it when I first heard it on Gossip Girl (the episode Roman Holiday).

 

My friend thinks I’m born 30 years too late. I think so too. In fact, I think I’m born 50 years too late. HAHAHA. I’m so retro

Inflation is damaging my health

I’ve always thought that it’s expensive to be healthy. A trip to nearby supermarket today only confirm that thought. I planned to stock up food in my room since school is starting again soon, and I won’t have that much time to go to supermarket during schooldays. So I thought I should opt for healthier choice instead of transfats-stuffed chips. But guess what, my favorite Red Globe grapes are more expensive by $2. So I look for longan, less healthy choice, but it’s also more expensive by $1 per punnet. ARGGH. Maybe I should buy apples, but all the apples there are such a sore sight. Urgh. So I ended up buying nothing (although the relatively cheap $3 Ruffles was definitely tempting, but wow, I didn’t buy it).

School starts again tomorrow!!! I don’t want to face my exam results!!!

The wonder (and curse) of a small town

Ah, I’ve been wanting to write about this a long, long time ago. You see, I came from a small town passed by the equator line on the third biggest island in the world. Only the town is small, by the way, everything else is big. We dream big, we have big house on a big land, even our mouths are big. That brings me to the first curse of a small town: everybody knows everybody, and words travel fast. My parents practically recognise at least one person on the obituaries on the newspaper everyday (oh-kay, so that’s a rather gloomy example). And when you do something wrong, the WHOLE town, believe me, the WHOLE town knows it (a little bit of hyperbole won’t hurt here). I’m reminded of that song “Secret” by The Pierces: …coz two can keep a secret if one of them is dead… Yeah, I guess that applies to people of my town.

Ever heard of this saying “You can take a girl out of a small town, but you can’t take a small town out of a girl” or sooomeeething along that line? Well, I think it’s true. You can’t really change the small-town ambition to prosper and to wander everywhere to achieve the Big City Dreams (another favorite song of mine by NeverShoutNever!). Well, this is the wonder of a small town in my opinion.

Another curse of a small town, I guess this applies to people of my town only, their greetings when they see you, is not hi-great-to-see-you or hello-how-are-you, but more of “Hi, how stuck-up you are for not contacting me” Oh-kay, so they mean it in a friendly way, but it’s getting irritating. Come on, if you’re dying to contact me to the point that I become a no-good stuck-up loser once you see me, why didn’t you contact me first?

Finally, the wonder of my lovely small town is the FOOD. Duh. Even after many generations of those who have migrated to other places, they will still retain their food culture and they will always come back to my town for the food! As one of the folksongs of my town muses “Once you drink the water of Kapuas River (that’s the famous river in my province, now you can guess where I’m from ), you’ll never forget this place” And you the excellent food vendors in my town have also run for generations. There’s something called the rich-people noodles vendor which apparently closes most of the time, so you’re really lucky if you get to eat the noodles, or something called the cock-and-hen kway teow because the vendor is run by this lovey-dovey old couple (if I’m not wrong, one of them has passed away recently, that’s so sad), and there is the forever-waiting noodles, coz it just takes forever for the vendor to cook the noodles but many people love them anyway (I LOVE THEM TOO!). Here’s a picture of one of my favorite dish, called “yam mee” which is definitely very yummy

OHHHH, my eyes have grown misty. I wanna go hoommeeee, let me go homeeee….

The Power of Daydreaming

My mom gave me this book called “The New Psycho-Cybernetics” by Maxwell Maltz last year (more I like I forced her to give me, she bought another new one after I claimed hers), but a fiction lover like me takes forever to read the non-fiction. So today, I finally reach page 106 (out of 430 pages) and I think the book is interesting!

It’s a self-motivational book, by the way. Apparently, just by imagining yourself to be successful, it’s more likely that you will achieve your goal. It’s like mental exercise, you keep playing over and over again what you want yourself to be like and your subsconcious mind will program your “success mechanism” to work towards that goal, almost effortlessly. WOW!

But isn’t that like daydreaming? (my darling friend guineapig thinks so too! ) And if I thought about it, it’s true that almost everything that I can envision myself in, I usually achieve it. Although I need to envision the real me, not someone completely different (I tried that and it failed).

I hope I can finish the book. My mom has undergone major change after she read the book, so I guess it does work somehow. And my hobby of daydreaming does yield some results hehehe.

Yellow Ribbon Round The Old Oak Tree

I used to love this song (“Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round The Old Oak Tree”), a lot! When I haven’t really understood what the lyrics mean, I have loved the tunes. And when I learnt about the lyrics, I loved it even more. Plus, this manga I really love (“Lovely Mari-Chan” by Kimiko Uehara), had similar theme as the song. You know: patience, distance, homecoming, mistakes, forgiveness, second chance, yada yada yada. But then the Yellow Ribbon Project (about accepting ex-con back into the society) spoiled it all, don’t get me wrong, it is a totally cool project and it’s really appropriate for them to use this song. Just that, my bad habits, I don’t like my favorite songs being commercialised, because I’ll get bored of it and it loses its appeals.

So anyway, talking about forgiveness, I realise that sometimes it’s difficult for me to forgive others. Ok, so I told them I forgave them, but I remember what has happened ,like, forever. Like those girls who snatched away my swings when I was in kindergarten (I GOT THEM FIRST, I RAN ALL THE WAY FROM THE CLASSROOM JUST TO CLAIM THE SWINGS, but we are quite good friends now, haha). But then, I tried to forgive, you see. I just see it as something very funny now.

Now, let’s talk about second chance. Another bad habits of mine, although I try very hard not to believe in gossips before witnessing them myself or in first impressions, I’m easily swayed by them. And guess what, I might have been very mean to those who actually wanted to change and to have the second chance. Oh well, I hope I’ll change for the better.

This is a very personal post, sobs. Don’t use it against me (or I’ll remember you till my dying breath…OOPS).

Midnight moonshine

I have learnt the perils of midnight chats, heart-to-heart, girl talk, whatever it is that involves chatting and telling secrets and gossips, an important element of sleepovers and overnight camps. I love it, because I get to hear people’s dirtiest secrets and I hate it, because people get to hear my dirtiest secrets. ERGH.

Participating in these midnight chats is like getting drunk (yup, that ‘moonshine’ pun is intended). It’s like as it gets later and later, less and less controls you have and more and more secret comes pouring out. And at the moment, all your darkest thoughts, all the secrets that you have guarded oh-so-dearly, all the inhibitions are gone, gone, gone, poof! And you kinda feel good about it, like unloading all the burdens. And realising that other people are just as screwed up as you (hehehe).

Soon, enthusiastic chats turn into drawls, so you fall asleep. Then come morning, and you get the hangover: regret and embarassment over what you have publicly disclosed the night before. But unlike alcoholic hangover that can be cured with Panadol or bathroom, this hangover stays with you forever.

Luckily, you can expect that most of your girlfriends probably feel the same. So at least your secrets remain within your private circle. But beware of witches or dormant witches who will reveal their true color if you mess with them. Uh-oh.

Walking the plank

Supposedly I have to cross this deep, wide, deadly cliff, and I have this super narrow plank ahead, which creaks and sags when I step on it, will I ever cross the cliff? If I’m afraid of dying, I will never step on the plank. On the other hand, if I don’t mind giving up my life, in other words, if I have nothing to lose, I would have stepped on it and guess what, I will end up on the other side safely because I’ve tried my best.

Bottom line, I will never ever be able to kickstart if I have so much worries and fear of disappointment and high, perhaps unreasonably, expectation.

Thanks for the inspiration, friend

I just…

survived the worst stomach cramp I’ve ever had in my whole life. It lasted for three freaking hours and it actually paralysed me, ’cause my legs became super weak and sore that I couldn’t stand up. Possible reason for this: lack of exercise.

And because of the cramp, I could not finish what I was supposed to be revising, so now, come the anxiety. Not that anxious anyway, ’cause I still find the time to blog tee-hee.

About me

I tried this personality test link on my friend’s blog and this is the result. It’s quite interesting because I have never got this kind of description. And the test is pretty extraordinary, too, it’s not the type that asked you what would you do in different situation, but more on your imagination. So I guess, maybe something is wrong with how I perceive myself? Ah, I guess I don’t really know myself. Anyway, some of the description rings true.

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don’t judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren’t necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people’s eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:

You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.

How do you view success:

Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It’s time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.